Lost Souls by AJ Lange

Author:AJ Lange [Lange, AJ]
Language: eng
Format: azw3, epub
Publisher: Wish House Publishing Co.
Published: 2020-01-25T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 11

Gavin had seen his share of bodies, in varying states of decay.

In his line of work, it was inevitable, and a time or two he had even known the victim. Today would be different, if they found her.

He had been haunted by Melanie Bodine’s face that summer, her shining curls and friendly smile plastered across the nightly news for weeks. It sickened him to know Matt had suffered the truth of her death alone, protected a gruesome secret, protected Gavin, and all he’d received in return was a best friend who had distanced himself.

At first Gavin had simply been wary, Antonia’s gentle caution heavy on his mind. In retrospect, Gavin knew had misread Matt’s subdued behavior, thinking his friend was sorry for the kiss they had shared in the cabin, that they had moved too fast. Unwilling to lose his best friend, unsure he could cope with a life where Matt wasn’t wholly in it, every day, Gavin had simply reverted to familiar behavior. It was never a conscious decision and it happened naturally, easily; they were simply best friends again.

Now that he knew the horrors of Matt’s home life, Gavin was devastated by the vanity and stupidity of his teenage self. Maybe if he had been more open and honest with him, Matt would have felt he had someone on his side, someone he could turn to. So many things might have been different.

Instead, Gavin had fucked Heather Morgan, a two-year mistake he would come to regret. Heather was the cheerleader to Gavin’s all-star athlete, and even as a teen he could admit he had enjoyed the notoriety that came with scoring on the hottest girl in school. Gavin still occasionally woke up in a cold sweat, dreaming about the afternoon she told him she thought she was pregnant. In an instant, Gavin’s future had flashed before his eyes. He could see himself clearly, changing oil and rotating tires down at the Jiffy Lube for the rest of his life, never having more than a third floor walkup. Never having the money to take a vacation, visit a beach or a national park.

Never having Matt.

It was an instant of clarity and truth for Gavin. The day, the hour, the minute he realized that he, Gavin DeLuca, loved Matthew Laurel. And had done so for so long, that his life would be dimmer, duller, unremarkable -- ordinary -- if he couldn’t spend it with Matt.

Dingy walkups and pitiful vacations seemed like grand adventures, if only he could change the person he shared them with.

People might say he was too young to know his mind or heart, and Gavin would normally be inclined to agree. But he was right about this. A sick fear had gnawed at him for days while he wrestled with a worrisome thought: what if it had been Matt who had placed this new distance between them, and not Gavin’s idiocy or the thing with Heather.

Heather wasn’t pregnant. That welcome news barely registered in light of Gavin’s inner turmoil.

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